Being Back

Hello all, apologies for "wetcat". I could take it down, but I’ll leave it as a testament to forensic computing. You see, I’m still beta testing ‘Flock’, but it ate my last blog. In an attempt [successful] to track where lost blogs go to rest I created wetcat as a ‘draft’. Apparently Flock had other plans for that too. Fortunately, inadvertent posting aside, It served it’s purpose  and I tracked down the offending *.rdf file. I’ll be posting the recovered data just as soon as I can pick out the coding burrs that stuck to its socks when it was tossed into the PC backwoods.

Alora, I have just officially returned home to China for the first time. I have lived in, and come-and-gone from China quite a number of times. But never back to a real apartment of my own choice before. It feels very nice. Having stuff is nice. Like leaves in a nest.

I even celebrated by joining a gym and yet further integrating myself into the local world. Apparently my gym, that is to say "Your Gym", has many members who are models. Thank you for asking but, no, I am not a model. And, no, I do not know the other American who goes to your gym and is black. I can’t say for sure whether this whole model business is true, I’ll keep my eyes peeled, but I do know it’s a pretty fantastic nearby facility, and for $187 a year, I’m sold. Thanks to Kaying and Amanda for the recommendation.

I’ll post more on KL in a bit, but I kind of want to say this: I’m actually here now. I know, I’ve officially been gone from the States for almost two months now, but I’ve really only been moved into my new apartment for one month. And I just spent the last two weeks in Malaysia. So I’m excited to really dig into this great big bowl of noodles known as shanghai and see what my chopsticks pull up.

As they say in Malaysian, Selamat Tinggal

wetcat

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Land Ho

I spent the last two days staying at the Old House Inn and I have to say, nice place. To be sure, it’s an inn. No wake up calls, room service, gym, or elevator but that’s what gives it its charm. And frankly, with my new philosophy of ‘lower is better’, any building in Shanghai that isn’t a high-rise gets my approval. It had hot water, internet, comfortable beds, well appointed (if small) rooms and a television.

I suppose the only thing I really have against it, is that they kicked me out. Popular as it is, I’m fortunate to have even squeezed two nights there, which I managed only because someone canceled their Friday reservation and I was able to change rooms.

Given that I’m actually on a budget here (alas, no two weeks in the Grand Hyatt) I spent several hassled hours on Friday night and Saturday morning trying to figure out where I’d go next all the while thinking ‘if I can’t even figure out where I’m going to sleep tomorrow… how the hell am I ever going to find an apartment?’ But, just when I thought all was hopeless (bags packed in the foyer, bill paid, and echoes of ‘No Vacancy’ ringing in my ears) the kindly staff said ‘hey dude, chill out, we’ve already booked you into another hotel… and it’s cheaper.’ I really do love China.

The Shanghai Literature and Art Hotel isn’t going to win any awards, and it’s smokier than a Manhattan fire escape, but it’s contributing to my peace of mind since I won’t be run out on the street any time soon.

So, I walked around a lot yesterday. Feet much sore. I pretty much covered most streets within a 20 minute diameter (NW, NE and SW) of the Jing An subway station. For now, I’m sticking to my plan of finding something within walking distance of the number two metro line into Pudong. My vital resources have been the following:

Maps (with District names and ‘good’ area recs):

http://www.smartshanghai.com/en/travel/sshamap.php
http://www.shanghairealty.com/shanghaimap.htm
http://blog.wangjianshuo.com/archives/2004/02/28/map-shanghai-good.areas.jpg

Advice & Classifieds

http://shanghai.asiaxpat.com/property/default.asp
http://www.shanghairealty.com/district_introduction.htm
http://home.wangjianshuo.com/archives/20040228_rent_an_apartment_in_shanghai.htm

I hit a real low point in the afternoon. After hours of fruitless searching (I had been assured local real-estate offices would be scattered everywhere… ha) I was pretty well convinced that the Chinese suffer some kind of universal dementia-related affinity for sinfully ugly high rises.

Of course, I’d actually walked by a fair share of low slung eccentric alley-way Shikumen. But the lack of agencies had me also convinced that finding a way into these bergs was probably an impossible task for an unconnected foreigner. Not to mention, I have been warned about living in these quaint alley ways what with their faulty wiring and dachshund sized roaches.

Hasty and illogical thinking, yes; disheartening nonetheless, also yes.

(Possible) Saviour came in the unlikely form of a Coldwell Banker office. Dark was falling, hunger was calling and I’d just finished ogling at the fantastic houses (actual houses!) on Ju Lu Lu and lusting after the quiet and endearing localness of Fu Min Lu and Chanle Lu when I reach the Urumqi Lu, An Fu Lu crossroads (haven’t we all be there…). Head home or  follow yet another long and winding block to another point unknown? The fancy art gallery on the corner persuaded me to keep on keepin’ on. The gallery was followed every 50 meters by another promising sign (wine shop, interior decorations, Kohler store!!) and I started to feel pretty good. Then it was there, a brightly lit office in whose window were hung pictures of property, like stockings at Christmas time. I hadn’t paused more than 10 seconds when someone came running out to offer assistance. Awesome.

As far as I have found, no website offers a reliable rundown of this city’s many, many  real-estate agents. There are plenty of people touting their own dodgy services, and a few third party raves about individual agents with companies named the likes of "Brian Real Estate Consultants". None of them, however, mentioned the thoroughly legitimate Coldwell Banker. Within 10 minutes, this guy was showing me old and new apartments alike… one of them even had an affordable garden. A Garden!

Now, I’m not holding my breath, the commission could be daunting, and the options less pleasing in person, but my outlook is thoroughly positive right now. Good people are on the job and I get to focus on enjoying other aspects of life. Like karaoke.

 

Flocks in China

Hello all,

Aside from the mass extermination of birds in China, I have to fess up to tech geekedness and admit the title reference actually belongs to the browser with which I am posting this. Flock represents the bleeding buggy advent of Web 2.0, and naturally I needed to test it out. I’m already impressed just because it allows me to submit this without logging into friendster. Huzzah, 7 seconds saved.

Anywho, I finally made it back to the mainland after my two week detour in Hong Kong. Among the busiest two weeks of my career at Kroll, but still confirming to me that HK is a great city. And despite the work, I mightily enjoyed my harborview hotel, and partook of several excellent pseudo-British expat experiences (dining at the Foreign Correspondence Club, a cheeky pint at the Hong Kong Cricket Club – where I met, drank with and generally underappreciated the British ‘legend’ Phil ‘Daffy’ DeFreitas – and cheering on diminutive men in knickers at the Happy Valley horse track)

But I’m glad to be moving on. Life on the road isn’t exactly an adventure from the norm when the norm has yet to be established. Let the era of apartment hunting begin! Actually, I really hope it’s more like “the weekend” of apartment hunting… though my sources tell me that’s mighty unrealistic. And yet, it’s not as though there’s a shortage of housing around here. Just a shortage of general quality.

As always, it does’t take long for this city to remind you that is is, in fact, a giant modern-day Barnum and Baily act. While walking to my thoroughly inland B&B last night I came across a 7-inch blue crab scuttling out of the center of the alley. How such a creature arrived there is a mystery I hestitate to dwell on. I just hope wherever I end up living doesn’t have a seafood infestation.

I look forward to catching up with you all soon. In the meantime I’ll be taking my vitamins, avoiding poultry (especially poultry with fish sauce… thanks Dragon Air!) and looking for a place to call home.

Exciting, Disgusting, or The Impending End of the World

Because I crave legitimate scientific recognition <whistle, whistle, whistle>, I give unto thee: more news of the disgusting Hydra-Monster. I know, I’m as surprised as you are, who’d have thought my fame would come from cymothoa exigua. But it will.

Yeah, well, you’ll see.

Ground breaking investigative journalism? Fortunate happenstance and too much time spent reading boingboing.net? I leave that to you to decide. What’s for certain is that this plus-sized ocean-pill is taking over the world. That’s my view on things, and I’m going places with it!

Why? You see, aside from parasitically eating and then REPLACING (!!!) the tongues of its fish victims, the BBC reported this week that scientists are "excited" to have found this species in Britain, whereas it was previously known only to live in the Gulf of California. California, Britain, Jiangsu province… you see where I’m going with this people. Look for excitement to become acute terror and emotional unbiased, lopsided well-rounded reporting on a local news station near you when the international scientific community realizes this crustacean has perhaps coincidentally drastically branched out of its native territory, and jumped species due to accelerating animal husbandry in China (ok, now I’m just making this up)!

An alternative explanation you say? Unpossible. Me is genius. But while I can live with an oversized IQ, if my tongue ever happens to turn into this, please, I’m begging you, put me out my misery. And then use my skin to make you all look pretty.

Damn Skyppy

eBay To Buy Skype for $2.6 Billion

Now that is one heck of an investment. Someone cool is now very, very rich.

P.S. My skype user name is the same ‘ol same ‘ol: harryalverson

My Chinese Name

Newly minted for my debut on the double-sided business card scene:

   艾睿奇
    aì rùi qí

[Update:] As deliberated and bestowed by Juliet Lee

Hair on the Wrong Side of the Law

Hu’s messing with human rights again? Yup, China. As if the blights of heredity and style weren’t painful enough, here’s CWCC to pour salt on your wounds:

Oddly Enough News Article | Reuters.com

BEIJING – In a bid to spruce up the city’s image, authorities in China’s Nanjing are banning taxi drivers who are bald, wear their hair too long, have moustaches or wear too much make-up, media said Tuesday.

The new rules are part of a 10-point plan to smarten up Nanjing, capital of eastern Jiangsu province, ahead of October’s 10th National Games which will draw viewers from across the country, the Chinese news Web site www.sina.com.cn said Tuesday, citing the Nanjing Morning Post.

"Male taxi drivers cannot have long hair or strange hairstyles, cannot be bald and cannot grow moustaches or goatees," the report said.

"Women drivers must not use too much make-up and should wear appropriate clothes."

The report did not mention penalties for drivers that break the rules, but did say that cabbies who refused to pick up passengers could be kept off the streets for up to 15 days.

The strict code comes at a time when middle-class Chinese are embracing all kinds of fashion thanks to two decades of market reforms that have rendered the Mao suit a relic of the past.

[Update:] Incidentally, October 10 is Swedish Names’ Day for "Harry". Though, clearly "Helmar", also celebrated on the 10th, would be much, much cooler.

Labor Day

To all the awesome people who responded to my advice-fishing email with comments, lamentations, well wishes and suggestions on staying (or whether to stay) in China: Thanks You!

I mean, really, thank you so much. No two letters were alike and all of them are now permanent heart warming keepsakes that I’ll read again and again over the next year, or print out and then use for heating fuel. Why? Well, because I’m staying.

In short, I’m doing this all for you. I know that deep in your nethers you’ve all been crooning for the opportunity to visit China but needed more of a draw. Yes, something more inspiring than the Great Wall of China; more compelling than 5000 years of history; more handsome than the verdant rice paddies and karst tors of guilin; and tastier than Beijing duck. Yay, in service of friendkind, I thusly throw myself onto your collective timebomb of ‘adventure-regret’ and provideth unto thee said opportunity: the chance to visit me. Come one, come all and enjoy a tiny apartment that looks like marble but is actually concrete and cardboard and we can set out for points absurd and unknown to eat xiao long bao and ‘act’ bewildered at all we see.

There was also this offer that may have been too good to refuse (starting with mandatory intensive Mandarin lessons supplanting a day of work for the first few months) but, mostly: for you.

Fear not, I’ll still try to annoy you all with regular emails, skype calls, blog posts and maybe even the occassional visit. And I’ll still be applying to schools too, so expect to see me poking around your neighborhoods come spring, but seriouly: come on out and join the fun.

In the short run, I’ll be back in the States as of September 17 to sort my life out. I hope to see many of you then. For now, I leave you with a quote from my new face scrub, the prestigioius 1872:

The joss-stick of France that derive from the technique fumes the dress grass whole effect essence researches to manufacture to use adopting the DEEP permeate system, delicate and clean white in fresh skin in quick instauration.

Office

Sorry I’ve been away for so long. My half started entries are starting to pile up across cyberspace, and each new day of memories is superceding the last. Time to switch to short entry blogging style. Up first for your enjoyment: my office, gold monstrosity by day, giant television by night. Funny, our New York office is next to a Citibank building too… I sense a Burger King-esque location strategy.